Flashback
Seems like it was just yesterday, I remember sitting in my room watching TV and hearing this tapping sound on the wall in our kitchen. I jumped out of bed and looked into the kitchen where Angel, my black Labrador sleeps. For some reason, this sound didn't resonate as familiar to me. This wasn't my dog scratching her paw and bumping into the wall, this sounded like she was running on the wall. And for a moment, that's what it looked like. Angel was having a seizure, the first one that I had witnessed, although it's probable that this was not the first one she had experienced to date. Having never experienced a seizure first hand from either human or animal, I can safely say it was the most terrifying experience of my life. In a panic, I woke up my mom, we called animal urgent care and they advised us to bring her in. Once she had come out of the seizure, she had stumbled around the kitchen a bit, before doing laps around the backyard and kitchen. The neurological aspect of a seizure becomes pretty clear almost immediately and it's difficult because you don't know what lasting effect it is going to have on an animal. They can't tell you where it hurts or what they are feeling or even what they are thinking. Later that night, after things had settled down a bit, I took Angel to the Vet Urgent Care in Newport Beach as they had suggested I do. Upon arrival, they want to run the full gamut of tests to make sure everything is alright, but at the same time, they prey on your vulnerabilities, rather than put you at ease. After spending $500 to have tests run, everything came back perfectly normal. To leave however, you have to sign a waiver releasing them of liability in which they basically say to your face, "we don't recommend you going home because who knows what could happen during the night, but it's your choice..." I understand that it's a business, but I am already nervous and scared, and right now as a medical professional, I need you to be calm, reassuring and supportive.
Back to Normal
Fortunately for us (and for Angel) she has an outstanding regular vet, Dr. Pursley of Northwood Animal Hospital. I always feel more comfortable when I speak with her about Angel's condition, probably because the doctor has had dogs with similar issues. But maybe even more so because I feel that there is a genuine level of compassion emanating from her. Something that seemed to be sorely lacking in the emergency room. Since the first seizure, Angel has been on a steady dose of a medicine called, Potassium Bromide. The medicine does a pretty good job of preventing seizures from reoccurring. Her day to day life went back to being the happy, energetic, puppy-like dog I've been accustomed to. There have been bumps in the road however and they are equally as frightening although now we have a little more idea of what to expect. I've witnessed three full convulsing body seizures and one that was the exact opposite. It's a crazy thing, looking at the animal you love and thinking that she is going to die. Three times I have looked at Angel and thought that she wasn't going to make it and each time she has come back strong and surprised me.
No Time Like the Present
This year has been without question, the most difficult year for Angel and I. If she could talk, I am certain she would agree. In the beginning of the year Angel abruptly decided that the food she had been eating for the past seven or so years was no longer suitable to her palate. When you get to be a twelve year old dog, it is understandable that your interests may change and so we did our best as owners to accommodate these changes. We have routinely shuffled through food options to keep her appetite satisfied and her energy up. Unfortunately, it hasn't been an entirely smooth process and Angel has lost about ten pounds off of what her ideal weight once was. As we celebrated her thirteenth birthday this past week, it's hard to say that there has been much to celebrate. The seizures appear to have taken more of a toll on her mind and in recent weeks it shows when she tries to walk. Legs just sort of give out on her for no reason and her head will shake through no fault of her own. It is beyond difficult to watch and even write about. In the end, I suppose to resolution will write itself. When your pet has an illness, you do whatever you can to help them because they are as much a part of your family as anyone. I love Angel and will continue to do whatever I can to keep her quality of life the best it can be for however long she has left.
Medicine, Care and Wellness in Society
Although this goes a bit off the main topic of this post, I wanted to close with a small discussion on medicine and care in our society. I have a tremendous level of respect and amazement for how advanced medical care has become in the world we live in. It is certainly hard to imagine living in a world without hospitals, specialists and urgent cares (which many people still do today). Yet I am equally amazed at how we as human beings can put a price tag on lives. Of course we live in a world that is driven by financial figures and bottom lines but it hasn't always been that way and in a perfect world, it wouldn't have to be that way. When Alexander Fleming discovered Penicillin in 1928, he revolutionized modern medicine by giving the world an antibiotic that could save countless lives. Science is phenomenal that way, it can save lives. And while I can't speak for Mr. Fleming, I am certain that he was more concerned with helping people than raking in massive profits off his discovery. We have the technology to save people's lives but only if they can afford it. Angel has had a number of tests run on her, the affordable ones. Hundreds of dollars have been spent, but we can't afford to have the brain scan that would likely have told us if she in fact had a tumor that was causing the seizures. If there was a tumor, we probably could have spent $5000 to have it removed and perhaps her quality of life might have been even better. I understand that the world I daydream about is not a reality. You talk about healthcare for everyone and you're a socialist or a communist. And sure, there are people who are those things, but I'm not. I believe that I'm just like any average person who wants a happy, healthy and comfortable life for myself and everyone in my life. If we have the cure for cancer, AIDS, spinal paralysis, then let's give it to the people. Aren't we better as a society when everyone is functioning and participating to the best of their ability?
